You might not know her name.
But Canadians certainly do.
Danielle McTaggart is the frontwoman of Dear Rouge, one of Canada’s most celebrated rock duos, which she shares with her husband Drew. More recently, she’s also been making music as the solo artist Larkk.
Offstage, she spent ten years longing to become a mother.
Now mum to Elliott and pregnant with a daughter, she’s still performing, with no signs of stopping. We caught up with her recently, nestled into her home by the picture-perfect Cultus Lake, BC, and captured her full-bellied glory. She opens up about hope, loss and staying creative while touring as a family of almost four.
Tell us about your journey to motherhood.
That’s a pretty heavy question for me actually. I know it’s the most epic journey for every mommy/parent. For me, I could never have expected it could be so difficult. It was riddled with loss, disappointment and grief for around ten years. I’ll never forget a doctor’s appointment where my doctor at the time said that I had a 0.1% chance of having children. After years of strange symptoms and feeling off, I finally heard this result. I would need all the help and strategy I could get to be on the path of parenting. It was devastating and confusing. I couldn’t help but to ask ‘why’.
Me and my husband, Drew, don’t give up easily, and after many years of deliberating next steps, we decided we would try the route of science and go to the fertility clinic. Which was so much fuller than I expected. Still rocks me to think about how many people walk this path of pain. Anyways, we ended up going through seven years of in vitro to finally get to the result of getting only two embryos. This felt like hope.
To our shock and joy, the first embryo took. This was almost three years ago now, and our little man Elliott was born. I felt so much joy. I felt so overwhelmed. I felt a lot of things. And I still do—but he was here and my heart felt the sense of healing and fullness I had prayed for.
So, now I am pregnant again with the second embryo.
It’s a girl.
I can’t help thinking about Psalm 34:8, "Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man (woman) who takes refuge in him!" I know what hope, pain and joy feel like, all rolled into one. And becoming a parent has taught me to put a lot aside and to trust the process. It’s really NOT a straight line. It’s all over the place. And that’s what makes it all so exciting.
What’s it like to perform while pregnant? How have you styled your stage wardrobe to showcase your belly?
It’s been hilarious, actually. It’s been a bit of trial and error to say the least, but very fun to play with different materials and stretchy pieces. Cutting tops and widening bottoms. The other day I had a serrated knife and cutting board out, because there were no scissors. And Drew was over my shoulder trying to help me slice up my control top pantyhose to fit my belly for the show. I giggle a lot, because of the process. I really wonder what it looks like from the crowd to see a very pregnant woman head-banging.
Maybe I should start a maternity fashion line for a very niche group of mama rockers ;)
Danielle letting loose onstage at a Dear Rouge show, baby belly covered in glitter. Photo by Zack Melhus.
What’s touring life like as a family of almost four?
It’s tiring and it’s a lot of manoeuvring and adjusting. But I am so thankful for my husband Drew and how good he is at strategising scenarios. He’s an amazing partner.
We both really miss the kids when we tour if they aren’t with us. They often stay with family. But we try to get back ASAP and we enjoy what we do so much, that we know it’s worth it for the whole family. I really love taking a holistic approach to parenting, where every person is an individual still, even though we’re a unit. If I’m happy and doing what I love, the kids see that. They know we believe in the dreams we all carry as individuals. I think that feeds their pursuit of their dreams and goals in the future.
I should also say, without our amazing families, we couldn’t do it. So I am eternally grateful for them. And I also know that we will always put our babies first. They are central to our story.
Your recent debut album under a new solo name Larkk was launched after the birth of your first child. What does it look like for you to push forward creatively while mothering?
Larkk was something I needed to make, to process the grief I had gone through in the season of waiting and longing. It was so important for my healing and then, taking it another step further, the healing of others that have gone through seasons of deep loss.
I think that’s the heart I move forward with in my creative process. Is this important? And is this something I need to make for myself and then others? And if the answer is yes, I’m gonna move forward with the most spunk and vigour I can. I LOVE the creative process and feel honoured every day that I get to explore the ‘landscape of the heart’ as a career. It feels like I was meant to and will always be this person who needs to create.
How has motherhood shaped your practice as an artist?
I think the first thing is energy. I think I’m a lot more intentional and pointed with my approach to creating. I schedule a lot more and I look ahead a lot more.
I also ask myself a lot about boundaries and self care. Does the next thing I’m creating line up with who I am and my values? If not, I don’t have time and space to do it anymore. I guess you could say I’m more focused and more intentional all around.
I feel very honest in my life at the moment. And I know that my art will reflect that.
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Thank you Dani for allowing us to capture your beautiful story and your even more beautiful soul.
We’re cheering you on, eagerly awaiting your birth announcement… and, of course, putting all your songs on repeat.
x
Bel + River
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Follow along with all the latest on Dani and what she’s getting up to here:
https://www.instagram.com/dearrouge/
https://www.instagram.com/larkkmusic/
Search ‘Dear Rouge’ or ‘Larkk’ wherever you listen to music.
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